NLV Logic's 2011 Election Reddys!

This near biannual post used to be called the NLV Logic Election Freddies, a spoof of the Freddy Awards put forth by the State Theater.

The Theater notes outstanding school district dramas. We highlight campaign gaffs in Northern Lehigh.

In a casual conversation with former blogger-news-reporter, radio show host and sometimes provocateur, Ken Petrini, Ken pointed out the term "Freddy" was a registered mark, but no matter. Parodies are exempt and there no consumer confusion here. I am not affiliated with the State Theater!

Freddy for the State Theater refers to the ghost of J. Fred Osterstock, who is said to haunt the Theater. He died in 1957.

It's is time to dump Fred. We have our own ghost up here and our ghost is better than their ghost!

Ask me. I'm prejudiced! I'm from up here, the Northern Tier!

Near the turn of the previous century, Jake Ruprecht, who lived in the Eile Dahl (Owl Valley) feuded with his neighbor, Will Zimmerman, over a strip of land near Rote Schtross (Red Street). He died pulling out a disputed fence.

With four big horses and a heavy wagon, Jake pulled on his neighbor's fence. The wagon upset and fell on him. The horses spooled. Jake was dragged to his death.

The good people of Albany and Lynn still say, Nau geht der alt Tcheek Ruprecht wider die Rote Schtross naus. (Now their goes that old Jake Ruppert along the Red Street.)

We’re told Jake yet appears to those traveling with horse, wagon and one lantern along the Red Street. But he may appear as a passenger in any slow moving convertible with the top down and one dim headlight.

I traveled Red Street last night with my broken down 8n and a half empty hay wagon. I crept along in first gear with die Licht aus. Tcheek appeared to me. He offered these insights, which I named in honor of him, the Red Street Ghost, the Election Reddys by Northern Lehigh Valley Logic:


Number 10: The resurgent five township supervisor question. This comes up somewhere in every municipal election. We don’t like our three Township supervisors, so let’s add two more. Now defeated in North Whitehall Township.

Number 9: The no growth candidate. Candidate for Lynn Township Supervisor Justin Smith railed against a so-called prevalent NO GROWTH philosophy. Who is that no growth candidate?

In the last 6 years Lynn Township implemented no new zoning rules other than (1) for mixed density in the village center, and (2) to allow residential homes in the I.C.

That is, unless you count that pesky repealed AARC!

Number 8: The winter storm of October 2011 knocked down trees and cut out power to many for days. Halloween’s trick or treaters were forced to stay home.

On the plus side, the plowed snow knocked down all those pesky campaign signs. And with no power, we did not have to hear those bull crap radio adds! '

Its all good!



Number 7: Photoshop! The Gang of Four less one. Good thing I did not stand in the middle! That would have messed up the picture!



Number 6: After thought in the primary that he would not become a working supervisor, North Whitehall Township Supervisor-Elect Steven Pany says, well maybe just part-time.

Take a hint from ethics opinions issued to other Township Supervisors. Two of them were from NWT. We don't need no stinkin working supervisors!

Number 5: Judicial Candidate, long time Lehigh County Commissioner, Allentown Parking Authority Solicitor and counselor for several other Lehigh County municipal authorities Dan McCarthey called State Representative and former prosecutor Doug Reichley a career politician out to live on the public dole.

I’m not a politician. You’re a politician. No you’re a politician. No I’m not, you are a politician. No, you're a politician . . .

Number 4: The Spendthrift Movement. A primary which focused on unnecessary spending had entrenched public officials hitching their wagons to a more frugal message. Reichley chided McCarthy for increaseing taxes by 16%. Even D.A. Jim Martin lauded he saved taxpayers $2,000,000 (but he would have liked a larger courthouse).




Number 3: Heidelberg Township Supervisor Candidate for reelection Steve Bachman, whose sign proclaimed, Keep Heidelberg . . . Heidelberg. What exactly does that mean?

I guess it’s the opposite of hope & change! Yup, That's Heidelberg!


Number 2: Sheriff Trooper Iron-man Ron Rossi. Although old as dirt, Sheriff Ron Rossi, oft seen jogging about Allentown, can outrun my aged butt. Rossi adds to his list of defeated Sheriff-wannabes, an Allentown Police Officer, a Pennsylvania toll collector and now a sitting County Commissioner.

But I can write what I want here. According to his defeated candidate, Rossi doesn't do computers.

And Number 1 goes to . . .


Donald Link and Steven Hadad. Commissioner Tom Creighton made the list in years past for his recycled township supervisor campaign sign written over with magic marker.

Northwestern Lehigh School Board candidates Donald Link and Steven Haddad had Tom one better. Their signs, apparently made by a first grader, used yellow construction paper stapled over a sign for a memorial golf outing and failed to say who paid for them. Perhaps their art teacher forgot about 25 P.S. 3258.



Footnote, Re: the Red Street Ghost, See, Quarterly of the Pennsylvania German Society, Volume 8, No. 3-4 (September-December 1974), p. 30ff. (and you thought I made this stuff up!)